I know that the primary audience of my blog lives in the Southern/Appalachia region of the United States; so you might be thinking, “Hey! We were in a drought! This rain is a blessing!”. I agree, the heat was getting unbearable and it was depressing watching everything die. But, working outdoors in the pouring rain is not my cup of tea. Because of the rain, this week has been super slow and let me explain why.

The whole purpose of us being where we are is to restore an old trail that has been destroyed by weather conditions, what type of weather conditions you may ask? Rain. So we’ll be working on something… and then it gets destroyed by rain. A good example is this: the trail has lots of divots where the rain has worn down the soil, so what we do is take the time to dig actual drains for those spots so the water can be directed off-trail. Sounds like a good plan, right? Wrong. Since this trail is an active construction site, there is a constant flow of heavy machinery driving around. That heavy machinery mixed with rain creates… ding ding ding… lots and lots of mud. That said mud then seeps into the drains we’ve dug, clogs them up, and water flows back onto the trail. It feels like we’re fighting a battle set to fail, it’s so disheartening spending hours improving a spot, and then coming back the next day to see its been destroyed. It almost feels like I’ve been wasting my time out here…

It’s times like these that I have to remember, I am not wasting my time. My existence is not a waste of space in the world, so what I do therefore is not a waste of time. This project may not be turning out the way that I envisioned it, but I am still doing a lot with my summer. I would even argue that this is the first summer in my life where I’m actually not letting my life “go to waste”. I am learning new skills almost daily, I am creating meaningful connection with people I hope to stay in contact with for the rest of my life, and I am learning how to spend more time with God. None of that is a waste. I am sure one day, I will realize that I took this whole experience for granted, and that I didn’t appreciate enough.

I only have two weeks left in my contract this summer, 13 more days and then I am “home for good”. I am ready to be back home. I feel so disconnected from my family, the world, and my own life. I feel like I am constantly playing catch-up as to what happened each week. At times, I tell myself I don’t care just so it don’t feel as bad, but I truly miss the connection that my community provides. What I am not excited about it having to go back to school and go back to working inside of a building! Yuck! I’ve enjoyed the feeling of the wind on my face, the sun kissing my skin, and gnats dive bombing straight into my eyeballs.

I feel like I don’t have a lot to say on what we actually did for work this week, it was all digging… digging… and more digging. In one section of the trail (which was once an old travelling road), we found the remains of an old culvert. That meant digging out dozens upon dozens of rocks from the mud. You just think to yourself there can’t possibly be any more rocks, where did they all come from, WHY IS THERE ANOTHER ONE. I would get into a groove with my rouge hoe, and then all of a sudden dink. This happened over and over. Alone, I probably dug out a dozen rocks, one of the National Park workers dug out over 30, she is a powerhouse! It feels weird destroying what another person devoted hours of dedication to, but that’s just the cycle of things in life. I’m sure decades from now, people will be tearing down parts of what we did because they found a new way to improve our work.

At the end of the day, the rain isn’t too bad. I find comfort in the sound of it. I want it to go away because I feel like it is destroying my hard work and preventing us from finishing this behemoth of a task. Isn’t that just very human of me, thinking the rain is specifically coming to destroy my hard work. God sent the rain for a reason, He sends hard times for a reason, and we go through trials for a reason. I am blessed that I have had this opportunity and all I ask of God is… keeping sending the rain!